(AND AMERICAN)

Door-to-door Salesperson

ONE of the biggest obstacles faced by door-to-door hawkers is homeowners pretending they aren’t in when they ring the bell. It makes their working lives more difficult, but they accept it as part of the job. Every one of us is guilty of doing it at one time or another, but how many of us would hide behind the sofa if we saw the former Duchess of Sussex heaving a suitcase of wares up our garden path? Immediately, Meghan would have an enormous advantage over her colleagues, an edge which would probably see her take the office Salesperson of the Month award time after time.

Admittedly, some products would be more suited to her sales patter than others; having spent countless hours in make-up before shoots during her acting days, she would make an excellent Avon lady, for example, advising clients knowledgeably about skin creams, blushers and lipsticks. However, with Frogmore Cottage servants having done all her cleaning for the past three years, she probably doesn’t know her Astonish from her Cif, so she might struggle to shift many of the products in her Bettaware suitcase.

Whatever she sells, Meghan is sure to be a hit with the housewives of Middle America, although she might find herself facing one problem. Being of mixed race and walking around affluent areas of America, there is quite a high chance of her being shot for no reason by police, who would later be acquitted of any wrongdoing.