BANKRUPT BRITAIN!
Chancellor looks for ways to tide what’s left of UK over till massive Brexit Dividend kicks in
AT 11pm on January 31st, the bells of Britain rang out in a glorious peal of celebration. And as those clanging chimes echoed loud and proud from John O’Groats to Lands End, the nation came together as one to celebrate the dawn of a brand new era of prosperity and opportunity in a country free from the shackles of the European Union.
Over the course of the initial twelve month transition period, very little will change in our dayto-day lives. But after that, once our negotiators have crossed the t’s and dotted the i’s on our straightforward trading deals with the rest of the world, we may feel a short term “pinch” as our new economy first flexes its muscles in the global marketplace. Of course, nobody ever said it was going to be easy – except Boris Johnson, Michael Gove, the ERG and Nigel Farage – and our newly independent country is well placed to weather this brief period of economic downturn before the big Brexit dividend begins to swell our national coffers. But during this extremely short and definitely temporary period, Chancellor of the Exchequer Sajid Javid will be forced to look at a variety of novel ways to raise revenue in order to keep the country off the bones of its fucking arse. We asked TV’s Money Saving Expert MARTIN LEWIS* to come up with ways to tide the country over until it gets back on its Great British feet. Here is a selection of his surefire schemes to keep Britannia’s head above the waves long enough for the big Brexit bucks to start gushing into our national coffers.