CANYOUSPOT…?

•An old couple in their car who can’t find the exit back to the motorway and are embarking on their tenth circuit of the services complex

•A doughnut vending machine that, for all anyone knows, has had the same doughnuts mouldering in it for the last six months

•A thirsty man who has just paid for a bottle of water with a £20, wondering why there are no notes in his change

•A man buying a chewable toothbrush, somehow unaware that it may not be a good idea to put anything bought from a vending machine in a gents’ toilet into your mouth

•A powdered egg salesman who has just lost £4 in a cock buzzer vending machine, wondering whether to get someone to open the machine or simply write off his loss

•An old woman whose daytrip bus driver has got fed up of waiting for her and left

•A queue of 5 electric cars with flat batteries that have taken an 80-mile white knuckle detour for a shot on the single working 2-hour “rapid charger” that may or may not have the correct connector

•A driver who has now been sat in the queue for the electric charger for 2 hours and 3 minutes, being fined a statutory £85 charge for exceeding her 2 hours free parking limit

•A man who has lost the will to live, failing to sell AA memberships from under a big umbrella

•A platoon of squaddies on their way to Catterick, laying waste to Greggs in a tactical strike on the pasties and sausage rolls

•A bewildered middle-aged man who has forgotten where he parked his car, trying to decide how much longer to look for it before he reports it stolen

•An old couple who have been coming to the services for tea once a week for more than 40 years, because “it was a treat” in the 1970s

•A football manager accepting a ‘bung’ from a Far Eastern betting syndicate

•A pair of sickly saplings in the car park that have been planted to offset the carbon emissions of the 10,000 cars who call at the services each day