VIZ

FACE AND HANDS

“It’s surreal, really,” says man with melting clock on his face

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Awho woke up to find a melting clock on his face has described the situation as ‘surreal’ in his first statement since the incident occurred.

MAN

“There’s no other word for it really,” said Len Fancy, a part-time cheesemong­er from Stevenage. “You wake up one morning and there’s a clock on your face, melting and drooping down the sides. I don’t know how else I could describe it, it’s just really, really surreal.”

persistenc­e

And Mr Fancy pushed back on suggestion­s that having a melting clock on your face was actually more bizarre than surreal.

“People have said that they consider it bizarre,” he vouchsafed. “Others have said it’s just plain weird. But I think ‘bizarre’ or ‘weird’ both imply that something supernatur­al is at work, whereas finding a melting clock on your face is more like the forced acceptance of the dreamlike as a valid reality. ‘Surreal’ really is the only word for it.

Clock-faced Len Fancy (main pic) and a man in a bowler hat with an apple in front of his face (inset right).

It’s completely surreal.”

However, a man in a suit and a bowler hat with an apple in front of his face said he knew exactly how Mr Fancy felt and agreed with his descriptio­n of the event.

“He is absolutely correct. His situation, and indeed mine, are just completely surreal, plain and simple,” he said, emerging from an egg held up by some long fingers which were themselves emerging from the ground.

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