NAKED AMBITION
Stripper reveals why he takes his clothes off for money
“FIRST things first, I am straight,” the stripper said.
I was halfway through a sip of coffee that nearly ended up sprayed over my notebook.
He didn’t even give me a chance to compose myself before he continued: “I was in catering working silly hours, and got really down. I thought there had to be a better way of earning money.
“So I looked into chatlines, gay chatlines because I don’t mind, I can talk to anyone. I looked into porn, but the money is rubbish and what’s on the internet is on there forever and I’m really glad I didn’t go down that route. “I looked at stripping, but all the men were 18 stone
mus- cled Chippendales and I can’t do a backflip so I thought that door was closed.”
To look at Mi c h a e l you would assume he was capable of backflips, but stripper-for-hire might not be the first profession that sprung to mind if you were asked to hazard a guess.
“There was a ladies night at a club, and all the women were giggling, and we found out a stripper was coming.
“When he walked through the door he just looked like a normal bloke. He might have gone to the gym a bit but other than that he was totally normal.
“When he went in to do his act I was peeping through the doors like a massive pervert and he pulled out the oil and bananas and did his thing and there weren’t any backflips. “I knew then that I could do it.” Michael-Rae Formston from Carmarthen is 31, and he’s been stripping for 10 years.
During the week he works as an actor, stunt man and personal trainer. He’s got a small role in the new Johnny English film, but says he hasn’t seen it because he hates watching himself.
He’s incredibly frank, a combination of Welsh honesty and the fact he’s seen and done it all in his decade of taking his clothes off for money.
“I went to an agency, and I told a few porkie pies,” he admitted.
“I said I’d been travelling but had just come back, and that I had been a stripper previously.
“They said fine, and asked me to send over some shots.
“I went ‘S***’ and ran over to the university photography department. I asked if any students needed to build their portfolio with fitness shots, and a few days later the head of department said there was a student who could do it. That was free, so I had the pictures done and two weeks later I had my first job. “It was in Aberdare, and I’d been told Aberdare was where the girls don’t care.
“This was a 40th birthday party, and driving down the dark streets I heard some pounding music. I thought it was going to be a club but it was just this residential house, and everyone was raving. I started to s*** myself.
“I rang the woman, who came out and paid me, and handed my CD over and she said to wait outside until I heard the music and then to come in.
“So I was waiting outside and I started to think maybe I could just do a runner with the payment, my knees were shaking so much.
“Then the track came on and I thought ‘f*** it, might as well’. The first song I stripped to was Outside by George Michael, dressed like a policeman.
“It was the most awful strip ever, but the crowd loved it, and when I finished my adrenaline was pumping and I went back and sat in my car and thought, ‘This I think I can do.’ It took about 40 jobs before the nerves went away, and then it was just work.
“The agency takes about half, so I make about £50 to £60 each job and have to take travel out of that.
“I’ve had a few weird jobs over the years: a husband sat and watched me strip for his wife, and there was no atmosphere. And I did a dance for a 90-year-old women who jabbed me in the face and the arse with her walking stick.”
But while Michael regards most of his experiences as good, harmless fun, there have been some that make him more uncomfortable.
On one job, he was asked to turn up in a quiet residential street with four other strippers. Once he got there things started to get strange. After finding himself in a property decorated with graphic pornography, Michael discovered he was the entertainment for an orgy.
“I went into the toilet, but one of the other strippers called me back and said I didn’t want to go in there because the wall behind the toilet was a one-way mirror, and someone could be watching from the other side.
“I was starting to feel very uncomfortable, but we were all together so we said if anything went wrong, scream, and we’d come running.
“They wanted us to do quickfire shows, one after the other, and I was fourth. I wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible. I was doing a whole GI Joe thing.
“When it was my turn I was put in a waiting area until the other stripper finished, and when I went in there was a 50-year-old man sitting down with a rent boy.”
The pair had sex while Michael performed.
“I got out of there and did my routine, and the guys in the audience were good, they didn’t touch me or try anything, it was fine, but then I just wanted to leave.”
Michael has to travel across Britain for his work, but he’ll always have a soft spot for his home: “My favourite are the Welsh clients. They’re so much more laid back and up for a laugh, not demanding at all. That’s not knocking English women, I’ve had some lovely jobs in Cambridge, but the Welsh are just so much fun.
“Sometimes a client can make demands of the routine, or put some rules in place like don’t pick anyone up, which I wouldn’t do anyway because if I fell over I could get seriously injured”.
Michael says his friends and family are comfortable knowing about his work: “Everyone who knows me knows my work, but I don’t advertise it. Some of the guys post selfies or have it on their Facebook but I don’t. It’s not my life.”
Dating, however, can be a challenge when you’re a stripper.
Michael has been single for about a year and said: “When it comes to dating I tell the women I’m seeing about my job. The majority don’t like it, and the minority do, but that’s a bit weird because they normally like it a bit too much. I’m looking for someone in the middle who isn’t bothered.
“I might get back in the saddle after Christmas and Valentine’s Day, save some money before I start seeing anyone.”
While Michael has plans for the future, as a child he knew being a stripper was an option: “I remember in school telling the careers adviser that if all else fails I’ll be a stripper, but I had zero intention or desire to be one, I was just being a smart arse.
“The original plan was to be an actor and it still sort of is.”
Michael hopes within the next few years he’ll have enough to start his own cafe: “I want to retire by the time I’m 35. The majority of the time I don’t enjoy it. I have to be careful not to get attacked or robbed.
“The only times I enjoy it are when a group is really loving it and having a great time. That’s when I get to feel good about myself.”