‘SOMETIMES I WAKE UP IN THE MORNING AND THE PAIN IS TOO MUCH’
Student’s eczema battle
ACARDIFF University student has opened up about his life living with eczema. Aled Biston, 22, has been dealing with the skin condition for as long as he’s known. Eczema is an inflammatory skin condition that causes dry or itchy skin, rashes, scaly patches, blisters and skin infections.
According to Aled eczema has “ruined [his] life” but he wants to speak out about his experience in order to help others who might be affected by the same or similar conditions.
“I have had to deal with it all my life,” Aled said. “But it was during sixth form that it got really bad because of the pressures of going to university and making those big decisions. That’s when I realised it was a major issue.
“When I was young I could manage it a bit better – my mum is a nurse and she was able to get the right cream from work. And then when the transition came and I had to take responsibility over it I found it was hard dealing with it every day. It was something very new to me – it had been something that I had dealt with before but it had never been as extreme as this.”
The skin condition mainly affects Aled’s arms and the back of his legs but can also affect his neck, chest and other parts of his body. Eczema has also had an impact on his social life.
Aled, who is originally from Pontarddulais in Swansea, said: “At the end of first year I remember going to Tafwyl [music festival] and my eczema was literally rife.
“I had flare-ups everywhere and I had no clue what to do about it because this was the first time it had gone completely out of control.
“I was hoping it was a one-off thing but unfortunately it has worsened. Now it’s a daily issue that I have to deal with.
“Sometimes I won’t go out to play football because the idea of what harsh weather such as rain or wind might do to my skin is enough to put me off. It makes me upset because I love football.
“During the summer I would wear jumpers – I would rather be hot or sweaty rather than expose my arms.
“I can’t wake up in the morning and go straight downstairs for breakfast because my skin is all flaky, it hurts, and I have to go for a shower. Going downstairs first thing in the morning is not something I can do and take for granted – it’s something that I really have to think about.
“Sometimes I wake up in the morning and the pain is just too much – I can’t get out of bed and I miss my lectures.”
Having kept his eczema a secret for many years Aled decided to open up to his friends and family about the skin condition two years ago.
“At the time I was really scared,” he explained. “I kept thinking – what would my friends think of me? Would people think I wanted attention? Was I doing the right thing?
“We live in a world where how someone appears or looks is important. Take social media for example – you see a
photo but nothing else, nothing that goes on in the background. You never show your bad side – you always show your best. It’s something visual and I was very aware of that.
“But then I thought I had to accept this was a part of who I was – it wasn’t a weakness, it was just a part of my personality and who I was as a person. There was nothing I could do to change it and the eczema was here to stay.
“The first time I told them I didn’t want to say it face-to-face in case I would have a breakdown. So I went to my room and I wrote everything down in a blog format – everything that I wanted to tell my friends and family in front of them but felt like I couldn’t and exactly how I felt. And then I sent it to all of them on Facebook and Twitter. I remember just crying and thinking: ‘Have I done the right thing?’
“But my friends and family have been so supportive. The next day my friends and I went for a swim at a nearby river and they told me how proud they were that I had said something, that they hadn’t realised the effect this had on me but now they understood. They understood why I went home early on a night out without telling them anything. It helped me so much knowing that my friends understood the situation. It has definitely brought us closer together.
“The person that I worried about the most was my girlfriend – I was worried about how she would react. But she has been absolutely amazing in the support she’s shown. When you get to know someone you think: ‘I’m keeping this as long as I can, I don’t want to put her off’. But she was completely fine and that was the moment that I realised I was going to be fine.”
Since then Aled has spoken openly about his battle with eczema, which has helped others in similar situation.
He said: “I don’t see any point of hiding now because people know about it and have accepted it. Rather than hiding it I embrace it and don’t see it as a weakness anymore. I’m not scared of wearing a T-shirt in the summer anymore. I have to deal with it now rather than hide it.
“Since talking openly about it I’ve had people come up to me on nights out either telling me that they or a brother or a sister of theirs are struggling with eczema or a similar skin condition – some are people that I’ve known for years but I never knew they had it.
“That’s the power of speaking out about it. It’s the mental side of it that’s the worst and knowing that there are people out there to support you is a very special feeling. I don’t think people realise it’s a reality for many but celebrating our imperfections is a good thing.
“I think people that don’t understand need to learn too. It’s easy to say but if you don’t understand someone’s perspective you won’t understand it as a whole. My word of advice for anyone that might be dealing with eczema is if it’s bad don’t let it get too bad that it ruins your social life like it did to me. Times like these are going to happen but it’s reality and you have to accept it but don’t let that stop you.
“Talk to your friends and family – they will understand. Be brave.”