Carer, 4, heated parent’s meals

AFOUR-YEAR-OLD carer emptied his parent’s bucket toilet and heated meals in a microwave, it has been revealed.

The shocking story emerged as the plight of carers who look after sick and troubled relatives was laid bare in a report to councillors in Carmarthen.

Mags Williams, the council’s young carers manager, said the service helped children and young adults who often hid their problems from teachers and classmates.

Ms Williams said the service was at the “crisis” end of the spectrum, and that identifying young carers in need of support was tricky in itself.

“Young people are often very sensitive about their home life, especially about mental health and substance abuse,” she said. “They’re very worried they’re going to be taken into care.”

Ms Williams said young carers were often very tired, anxious, lonely, and late for or absent from school.

Some were bullied, she said, and felt angry, while others displayed “challenging behaviour”.

She said: “They feel, ‘Why is this happening to me? Why can’t I have a normal family?’”

Around half those helped by the young carers and young adult carer services have relatives with mental health and/or alcohol and substance problems, while the other half have relatives with a physical disability or disease.

Ms Williams said: “The youngest we’ve had was aged four.”

This child’s parent was bed-bound, and the youngster would empty the parent’s bucket toilet and also heat up meals in the microwave to help out.

Ms Williams said the parent now received a full package of care following intervention.

Another successful intervention gave two siblings, whose troubled mother had mutilated herself, leaving “blood spattered all over the walls”, the opportunity to progress into further education.

Ms Williams added: “They (young carers) want to feel supported.”

But she said that in 17 years of doing the job she had never seen so many suicide attempts among young people whose lives had been affected by relatives with this range of needs.

There were also practical elements to their role, such as knowing the sideeffects of medication.

The average age of young carers UK-wide is 12, and one in five of them misses school.

Ms Williams and her colleagues work with other departments and organisations such as adult social services, child and adolescent mental health services, college mentors, police and the charity Crossroads Care.

The council also provides a “hidden from harm service” for young people who don’t have to be carers but whose family life is affected by alcohol and substance misuse.

Councillors from two scrutiny committees who listened to the presentation asked what they could do to support the work of the service.

Councillor Rob Evans said: “I commend the work you are doing. You are definitely saving lives.”