Western Morning News (Saturday)
Is this really any way to treat a child?
IT must be a mixed blessing for any parent to have a child with a talent for some kind of sport. While coming with enormous pride, the journey along the way is fraught with conundrums which take the normal challenges of parenting to another level.
Take Debbie Daley, for example, whose son Tom is now not only a Olympic Gold medallist but also finished an incredible challenge for Comic Relief this week.
Watching what Tom went through as a child athlete, from bullying to the incredible pressures of daily unremitting training, would make any mum wonder if they were diving into a parenting disaster.
Then came the loss of her husband and Tom’s father, Rob, when her entire family were at a painfully young age.
On top of that, Tom had the strain of deciding when to come out as gay, which perhaps made his mental battles with terrifying twist dives pale into insignificance.
But while having the 100% support of his mum and dad, Tom was perhaps lucky they weren’t those pushy parents kicking him while he was down and only showing pride in his success.
We’ve all seen them, shouting from the sidelines, encouraging their children in a sport or activity which maybe they hoped, but failed, to accomplish themselves.
While still cringingly displayed at some grassroots level competitions, we rarely see such displays of parental or even public disappointment for our athletes competing on the world stage.
Not so for the Russians who appear discontent with anything but podium finishes.
Many people found it almost chilling to witness the cold way distraught figure skater Kamila Valieva was treated by her Russian coach after she fell in her routine at the Beijing winter Olympics this week.
Valieva, aged just 15, already weighed down by a doping scandal and questions over the wisdom of allowing her to compete, came fourth on Thursday after several mistakes.
There was no hug or any kind of comfort from coach Eteri Tutberidze when she immediately came off the ice. Instead she was asked “why did you stop fighting?”
Tutberidze, whose training methods were already under the spotlight, did put her arm around the young Russian while she waited for her score. But moments earlier had again demanded to know: “Why did you let it go? Explain it to me, why?”
As unbelievable as it may seem, the coach’s reaction is perhaps typical of the response any ambitious parent would give if their protege failed to deliver the goods.
While they can give all the time and spend all the money in the world on honing an athlete, they cannot get inside their minds.
And anyone who has succeeded in any kind of sport will know that the mental battle is as big, if not bigger, than the physical challenge.
Valieva must have been terrified of failure. She was favourite to win the women’s event, having set several world records in the short time since she made her senior debut in October.
And despite the obvious effects of being accused of being a drug cheat, she maintained her calm and led after Tuesday’s short programme, despite an initial stumble.
But her series of falls and messy landings on Thursday ruled her out of the podium finish that everyone expected of her.
While beautiful to watch, there has always been an ugly side to figure skating dating back to the Tonya Harding scandal and probably much further.
It does not sit well at the Olympic Games, for which so much is sacrificed by the athletes in order to win a place.
And while the joy of seeing Tom Daley win both world champion and Olympic medals can never be underestimated, his mum’s respect for her son undoubtedly runs much deeper than superficial pride.
Who else would pitch up, in a tracksuit, under the glare of the national media, to run alongside him knowing he was probably starting to get very tired, and perhaps a tad irritable, on the final leg of his Comic Relief Journey.
Being an athlete’s parent is certainly a job for life.
Many found it chilling the cold way distraught Kamila Valieva was treated by her coach