“I’m very happy with my life and that’s a great thing to say at the age of 80, don’t you think?”
I’m forever grateful to be here; I’m truly
enjoying every day. I’m very happy with my life. And that’s a great thing to say at the age of 80, don’t you think?
There have been long studies about men and women that after 50 they get
less hostile, less anxious. Some of it may have to do with changes in the brain, but mostly it’s the attitude that more life is behind us than is in front of us. We’ve been there, we’ve seen things. What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger, right? Life is more stressful when you’re young.
It makes me very sad that people are
afraid of death. It’s just our culture. In Mexico, for example, people are not afraid of dying. There’s an attitude of sooner or later we’ll be together… death, come and get me. But as long as I am still among the living, I’m going to have fun.
I watched my father die and he went
out with regrets. I’m not afraid of death, but I am afraid of leaving with regrets. That dictates how I live.
I have a son who is perfect – and
I am not kidding. He sits me down sometimes and tells me to act my age. My daughter, on the other hand, knows how to press all my buttons. But it doesn’t last. It goes away. And my meditation helps with this as well.
Would I marry again at 80? No! I just left my last boyfriend about a year ago, and I feel great. I wouldn’t be able to read three books in one week if I lived with somebody. And I wouldn’t be able to get nine hours of sleep either.
I look for different qualities in a man now than I did 20 or 30 years ago. I now
understand the importance of kindness. I didn’t realise until I was in my seventies and with a man who was kind that it’s what I’d been missing all along.
It’s also important to find someone
who is able to cherish you. I don’t know why men are so afraid to be vulnerable to cherish a woman. To be able to do that you have to be very open, and a lot of men are not capable of exhibiting that quality. They’re being taught not to cry at an early age; very early on they often learn not to show empathy. There’s a toxic masculinity out there. When men are shamed they get violent. My mantra in life is that it’s much better to be interested than to be interesting. Does that make sense? I’m curious about life and it helps me to stay youthful.
Book Club is in cinemas now. w&h