the best things in life are free rosie Green on the joy of freebies

Nothing in life inspires joy like a freebie, says rosie Green. She’s not proud…

Warning: I’m anticipating news of a worldwide tomato ketchup sachet shortage will soon be disseminated through international news outlets. The reason for the dearth? My son. For him there is no meal, no organic meat, Ottolenghi dish or freshly picked vegetable, that cannot not be improved by Heinz’s mix of tomatoes, spirit vinegar, sugar, salt and spices.

I am obviously slightly disdainful of his excessive usage (as I see it), so he has become secretive about his behaviour. And as such, when we visit service stations or pubs or any lower-brow eating establishment, he stealthily stockpiles sachets, and secretes them in his pockets or his rucksack. When those storage options are full or unavailable, he will slide them surreptitiously into my handbag. This is problematic, due to the potential of spillage on the grey leather and the likelihood of whipping out a packet of Heinz’s finest when trying to produce a pen in a top-level meeting. But I am happy about one thing: he’s inherited my joy of getting something for nothing…