Face your fears! Don’t let your phobias hold you back

Don’t let your phobias hold you back. Faye M Smith discovers the easy ways to rid yourself of persistent anxieties

Does a fear of flying stop you from booking a sunshine break? Do you hate getting behind the wheel, so therefore haven’t seen friends for ages? You’re not alone. A report by YouGov found that 55% of Brits have a phobia, with 48% of us avoiding certain places because of it. “Phobias are a type of fear, but are irrational or extreme, where the potential danger of a certain situation or object is exaggerated,” says Dr Mark Winwood, director of psychological services for AXA PPP Healthcare.

“The thought can be paralysing.”

What makes us susceptible?

So why do some of us get affected by such anxieties? “We’re actually only born with two fears – the fear of falling and loud noises,” says Dr Winwood. “All others are learned.” Known as a “learned response”, phobias have been caused by a shocking or traumatic event, which has developed into an aversion to anything associated with the memory. “For some people, the origins of why we are phobic is less clear,” says psychotherapist Toby Ingham (tobyingham.com). “We don’t remember the particular experience, all we know is that we may have been left with the residual sense of fear or phobia.”

Time to change

However it started, it’s important to remember that fear is a natural response to a threat to survival – it’s there to protect us. “If we can think about our fears differently, we can see them as a positive, motivating force,” says Dr Winwood. “The first step is identifying what our fears are and the function of them. The more we can understand them, we can stop them from limiting us. We can then stop our fears disabling us, and feel empowered.” Here’s how… Driving anxiety can start gradually, after an accident or near miss, or can be linked to a fear in your own ability to take control. If you’re also menopausal, fluctuating hormones could be to blame. “If you were a rather anxious driver before, the physical and cognitive symptoms of the menopause could make driving feel even more scary,” says psychologist on behalf of Healthspan, Dr Meg Arroll (drmegarroll.com).

Cure iT Start with small trips or try difficult journeys with a friend first. “it’s important to discover what it is about driving that actually creates the fear,” says Lorna Cordwell from Chrysalis Courses uK. “When driving is criticised by others (often partners), it destroys confidence. This is an issue that can be explored in therapy.” >>