I gatecrashed my daughter’s gap year how one mum relit her wanderlust and rediscovered her mojo

A backpacker trip to central America was what Alison van der Lande needed to recover from a serious illness - and get her mojo hack

As my 23-year-old daughter, Daisy, filled me in on all her upcoming travel plans to Central America, I couldn’t help but be envious. I loved travelling and often reminisced with her about my escapades in my twenties.

“Mum, you’re always talking about how you’d like to travel more. Why don’t you come with me?” she asked.

I felt a thrill go through me. How many daughters ask their mothers to go travelling with them, even if it was only for a few weeks. Could I? I instantly felt guilty at the thought. I had so much going on, but I’d never really had any time away to do anything for myself.

As I began to run through excuses, she stopped me in my tracks: “I’ve said you could come, now book your flight!”

Five years ago I had a brain aneurysm and two years later I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I had survived both, but that’s not to say they hadn’t taken their toll. It was a stressful time and trying to keep my business

afloat with three children to think about was tough. Amid it all something my doctor said kept echoing in my head: “Right, we’ve just saved your life, now go and enjoy it.”

I was 52 and pretty sure I was going through a midlife crisis. Despite having a successful handbag business, I had lost a lot of confidence and began to question who I was. When I floated the idea to my husband, he said, “For God’s sake, just book it.”

I booked a flight to Guatemala City and, in May 2018, packed a backpack borrowed from my son and said goodbye to my husband at the airport. As soon as I got through security, I headed to a bar, ordered a gin and tonic and burst into tears. I didn’t know who I was or what I was about. Going on an adventure like this was both a release and overwhelming.

One thing I did know was that this was going to be a trip on Daisy’s terms, so it would be no-frills all the way. Daisy met me at the airport and booked us a private room in a hostel for the first night to help me adjust. After that it was mixed dorms all the way, which was interesting to say the least! I felt self-conscious about my age, but I kept reminding myself that this was Daisy’s trip and I was just going to have to fit in. I needn’t have worried; the camaraderie among travellers was intoxicating.

Guatemala City was quite daunting but the sights, sounds and smells were fascinating. There were guards with guns strolling around everywhere but at least we felt protected. We travelled on colourful “chicken buses”, so called because people used to ride on them with chickens under their arms, and from Guatemala City we travelled through Belize and North Mexico.

We cycled all day long. It was such fun and I felt free, so much so I overcame my inhibitions about my mummy tummy and lived in a bikini and flip-flops, which I would never have done at home.

Daisy announced she’d arranged for us to go swimming with whale sharks an >>