‘One night stands are horrible’

Emma Donaldson, 47, is from Leicester.

Like a lot of people I assumed a one-night stand would be full of passion, well, I can tell you they are anything but. I had my first – and only – one in April 2012, after meeting a man online. The next day I felt horrible – it just wasn’t me.

I’ve been in and out of long-term relationships ever since I lost my virginity at 18. A serial monogamist, back then the thought of getting drunk and sleeping around wasn’t something I wanted to do but, as I reached my twenties and my friends started to settle down and have children, that didn’t appeal to me either. I enjoyed my independence too much.

That’s why when I moved in with my partner of five years in 2002, although we tried to make a go of it, I realised I preferred my own space. And so three years later we separated.

I didn’t have sex again for seven years – until that fling in 2012. Since then I’ve had two more relationships, but they didn’t work out. I’ll never settle, regardless of whether the sex is amazing or not.

As I’ve got older I’ve gained more confidence in myself. I have a job I love, working as a teaching assistant. And although I’m still single, I know that when I do find someone, they’ll have to fit in around my life – it will never be the other way round.