Can I force her to tell me what’s wrong?

My mum has been very ill and I know she sees her doctor just about every week. We think she has cancer but she won’t talk about it with my dad, me or my brother, or her sister. She won’t let my dad go with her to appointments either. When we try to ask her what’s wrong she changes the subject, and when we try to insist she lets one of us talk to her doctor, she says she has a right to her privacy. Does her right to privacy count in this case?

Suzie says:

You may not like the way she’s handling this but her right to do it her way remains no matter the situation. If her illness was such that her doctors had to say she ‘lacked capacity’, which means she was unable to make reasonable judgements, then family may be asked to step in. But while she is in her right mind, even if that conflicts with your preferences, she can say no. Tell her you love her, and ask your GP for support for yourself and your dad.