My health story ‘I didn’t have a full night’s sleep for 12 years!’
Pamela Evans is finally able to drift off...
There’s nothing quite like a good night’s sleep to make you feel refreshed – and, after 12 years of tossing and turning, I know that better than most… Growing up, I never had trouble sleeping. as a child, although I’d moan about my early bedtime I’d drop off as soon as my head hit the pillow. and, as a teenager, I loved to lie in.
But in June 2002, I started finding it hard to fall asleep. I’d struggle to switch off and then I’d wake up before my alarm. Back then, aged 23, a few less hours a night didn’t affect me – I still worked 9 to 5, and would go to the pub after work. But in December 2003, I moved in with my partner, Rob*, and we got married two years later. By then I was struggling to stay awake in meetings and would nap as soon as I got home.
Rob tried to help, brewing camomile tea and running a relaxing bubble bath for me before bed, but nothing worked. My sleeping pattern had become so erratic that I’d get up in the night and spend hours watching repeats of Will & Grace.
Sadly, Rob and I drifted apart and in January 2008 we filed for divorce. But, while it might sound strange, I never told anyone else about my insomnia – I didn’t want to burden friends with my problems. And I didn’t go to the doctor, even when I was getting just two hours of sleep a night. After all, I wasn’t in any pain.
I survived by drinking coffee and eating sugary food to give me energy. While I quickly ballooned from a size 10 to a size 18, at least it helped me stay awake during the day. But then, in February 2014, my dad passed away after a short battle with bowel cancer. I’d never lost someone so close to me before, so when the HR department at work suggested I use the in-house grief counsellor, I thought it might help me cope.
It was during my first session that the counsellor asked me why I kept yawning. ‘I don’t sleep,’ I said simply. Seeing the concerned look on her face, it was the first time in 12 years that I realised this wasn’t something to ignore.
So, every week when I went to my counselling session, we discussed ways to help me sleep. We didn’t dwell on the cause of my insomnia, but instead worked together to solve the problem. When she suggested mindfulness – using meditation and breathing techniques to relax – yes, I was sceptical, but it was worth a try.
That next day, every few hours, I’d find a quiet place and, closing my eyes, I’d spend five minutes focusing on breathing deeply. And when I climbed into bed that night, I did the same thing. I didn’t realise it had worked until I woke up the following morning – after four hours of sleep. While it might sound a paltry amount to some, for me it was a miracle.
The more I practised mindfulness, the longer I slept. Getting some much-needed rest meant that my waking hours were more productive. I didn’t need eight lattes to get me through the day and I could stay focused for longer. I even began losing weight, dropping to a size 14.
Three years on and, while I do have some bad nights, I regularly get around seven hours’ sleep. Now I’m full of energy.