BREAKFAST the children go rogue and eat huge bowls of honey nut clusters, which are 402 cals per 100g. with full-fat milk. cripes. i eat my usual porridge with soya milk and sultanas. under 200 cals. am i a health guru now?
LUNCH i rifle through ancient cookbooks with horrid photographs of anaemic food. all the recipes are annotated with a convenient calorie content. i earmark a few for later, lunch on homemade leek and potato soup and rebelliously refuse to calculate the calories.
DINNER i decide to serve ‘one-pot cheesy pork and potatoes’ from a bbc goodfood book for no good reason other than it is 580 calories per serving. my family make me promise never to make it again. my husband wonders aloud if it might qualify as a hate crime. petits filous for pudding; 48 calories a pop, breaching the 600 limit by 28. oops.