The rules of tantric sex

Expert solutions

QHaving just started a new relationship, I’ve found a new enthusiasm for sex. And we’re now both wondering whether to try an online ‘tantric sex’ workshop for couples that we’ve seen advertised. But neither of us has ever done anything like this – I’m not even sure I know what tantric sex is. Can you explain? And can you tell us how to judge whether this particular workshop is right for us?

Susan says

A‘Tantric sex’ often refers to sexual traditions from Hindu beliefs – though nowadays the phrase is generally used about slow, mindful sex where partners connect emotionally as well as physically. Should you sign up to this workshop? Talk to the workshop leader – any good Tantra teacher will help you understand what is being offered and decide whether it’s suitable for you.

Sadly, women often take longer to climax than men do – and typically climax less easily through intercourse alone. But here are three reasons why our orgasms are great.

They’re longer

Male climaxes usually last between 1030 seconds. But depending on our mood and the length of foreplay, ours tend to be longer

– sometimes reaching a full minute.

They’re more variable

For most men it’s just penis or testicle stimulation that tips them over the edge. But women often climax from stimulation of many body areas, like nipples or ears. Plus, our orgasms can differ hugely from each other.

They’re repeatable

A man needs time between his climaxes before he can go again. But we women can often orgasm repeatedly in a single sex session, often with only minutes or even seconds between climaxes.