‘I WANT TO EMPOWER PEOPLE’

Lara Besbrode, 53, runs an introduction and matchmaking agency, The Matchmaker UK. When I first dipped my toes into the world of dating apps in 2016, I was working in PR, raising three kids and trudging through a stressful divorce. Flicking through the profiles, I was met with airbrushed skin, whitened teeth and dog-eared Snapchat filters. Still, I did find one man I seemed to click with, and he had an impressive career as a neurosurgeon.

When we met, I was hit with an instant blow of disappointment – he looked nothing like the pictures on his profile, enhanced by filters and clever editing. Still, I thought I’d see past it.

For three months we met for coffee in the grounds of the hospital where he worked, always in his scrubs after theatre. Little did I know he was involved in a whole different kind of theatre – he’d fabricated his entire personality, his job and even his name!

It made me realise how easy it is for people to hide their true selves when dating, especially online. Four years on, in March 2020, I set up my own matchmaking agency. My focus was empowering people to find love while embracing their authentic selves. As part of their membership, my clients have their pictures taken by our professional in-house photographer, to make sure they are as true to their real selves as possible.

Every day, clients send me heavily filtered pictures, and it got worse in lockdown. It isn’t just young people, either – I have clients in their 70s and 80s sending me tampered pics. Some find our filter ban amusing at first, but everyone is on board with our mission.

I want to encourage my clients to be themselves, as that’s when we’re most attractive. We might get an instant boost seeing ourselves with a filter, but long term, our self-esteem suffers. Changing the law for influencers is a positive step, but I want to see dating apps follow suit too.

✱ Visit thematchmaker.uk @thematchmakeruk

‘It’s easy to hide your true self ’