Why can’t I keep my mouth shut?
At times, I want to warn young women it never ends, this see-saw of love and responsibility, the ups and downs of parenthood, the guilt and joy, delight and exhausted misery of being a mother. As a grandmother, you have to learn to keep your mouth closed and if, by accident, you let an opinion slip (‘Darling, isn’t it time he had a haircut?’), you must be ready to cope with the irritation you have known since that dear little child first scowled, ‘No, Mummy, go away!’ – and pierced your heart. Just the other day, in charge of Max, two, I gave him the wrong thing for supper and was frowned at by Kitty. How was I to know?
Sacrifice Vs self
This is the price we pay for loving. As soon as you become a mother, you are placed forever on the interface between sacrifice and self. Of course, you’re still a human being with personal wants, yearnings and faults. Why wouldn’t you be? But, if you cannot bear the idea of duty, you shouldn’t be a parent.
The rest of us muddle through. Yes, we make mistakes and worry about them. Yes, we get frustrated, feel regrets and know we might do things differently the second time around.
But remember, even if you get things wrong, there will be many more times when you get parenthood gloriously right – and that will be what your children remember, when (at all stages) they give you a hug and say, ‘Thanks, Mum.’