Debate: Do stay-at-home mums have it easy?
It’s long caused conflict, but while some think mothers who don’t go out to work are lazy, others argue they are busier than ever
‘Coffee mornings take up a lot of time, I’m sure!’
Emma Miles, 48, lives in south-east London with her 12-year-old daughter, Lily-rose. Stay-at-home mums are lazy – there, I’ve said it and I know many other mums will agree with me. I’m a single parent to my 12-year-old daughter and have worked since she was eight months old. Stay-at-home mums witter on about being there for their children as a justification for stepping out of the workplace. But for the most part, they don’t work because they don’t want to and are lucky to have a partner to shoulder the full financial responsibility. I often hear women say that being a stay-at-home mum is just as tough, if not tougher, than being a working parent. Who are they kidding? Everything a stay-at-home mum lists as their daily has ‘chores’ the working mum to do as well as going to work. I wake up at 6am, get ready, do breakfast, get my daughter ready, take her to school, catch the train, do my job, commute home, cook, clean, put a wash on and everything else that’s required to run a household. What do stay-at-home mums with children at school, do all day, that a working mum doesn’t do, too? Coffee mornings and lunch dates take up a lot of time, I’m sure! My daughter is bright, well-adjusted and confident, to and I attribute much of this me going to work while still the being a good mum. That’s example we should be setting.
‘Being a devoted mother should be celebrated’
Suzanne Simpson, 34, lives in Edinburgh with her husband Jonathan, 36, and five children. I’d love for a working mum to spend a day in my shoes so they can see just how much I do. I’m a mum-of-five, to Dani, 14, Joseph, eight, Millie, six, Isla, five, and Elijah, two, and I spend most days looking after them. My day starts at 6am when Elijah wakes up and, from that moment onwards, I barely have a second to myself to even make a cup of tea – I’m too busy, cooking, cleaning, washing clothes, grocery shopping, and – because I home school them – supervising their school work, too. My husband has a demanding IT job and we are very lucky to be able to live comfortably off his wage, but we’ve also had to make sacrifices. We haven’t had a family holiday abroad in years and I can’t remember when my husband and I splurged and treated ourselves to something nice. But those are things we are willing to compromise if it means I get to spend more time with the children. I feel privileged that I can be there for them whenever they need me and I don’t think it’s fair that mums like me are judged for that privilege. Being a devoted mother is something that should be celebrated, rather than berated.