Real Life The way I see it

‘THERE’S STUFF MUM DOESN’T NEED TO KNOW’

Daughter Lily, 18, says: Mum and I get on really well, and my friends think she’s funny and cool. She’s more laid-back than other mums, and I can talk to her about anything. But she doesn’t get what it’s like to be a teenager these days. My friends and I use social media, and Mum often has no idea what I’m talking about.

I like spending time with her, and she’s open-minded, but there’s stuff about me she doesn’t need to know! We’re at different stages in life. It’s hard to imagine her being my age, and, to be honest, I’m not sure I want to. I like her being my mum.

‘THEY DON’T OFTEN ARGUE’

Tess’ husband, Erik, says: Most people acknowledge fathers have a special bond with their daughters, but they’re rarely considered friends in the same way mothers and daughters are. Lily and I have much more in common than she does with her mum. We often play cards, and when Lily is home from uni and Tess is off on a book tour, we eat dinner together and like watching the same TV programmes.

Tess and Lily don’t often argue, mainly because Lily’s always been level-headed. She’s not a saint, but she’s never needed reining-in like her brothers. She talks to me almost as much as she does her mum, though she doesn’t ask for my fashion advice!

‘IT GOES BEYOND FRIENDSHIP’

Friend Sarah Bates says: I’ve got three boys, so envy the relationship Tess has with Lily. As soon as boys hit the teen years, they only communicate with you in grunts. Lily talks to Tess all the time. I used to be like that with my mum, and miss that closeness.

Women who just want to be friends with their daughters are doing themselves a disservice. There’s a saying that a son’s your son till he takes a wife, but a daughter’s your daughter for the rest of her life. I’m hoping I get a daughter-in-law before too long!