MY LIFE MAKES ME SAD

Q

I’m in my late 40s, and my husband is in his 50s. We love each other, but we don’t show it or say it anymore. I don’t know if it’s just tiredness, 20 years-plus of marriage, or I feel old and unattractive, but we don’t have sex and we never go out and see friends. I can’t bear the next 30 years of our lives to be like this.

A

It’s so easy to fall into a midlife rut like this. There isn’t one solution, but rather a series of small steps that will start to change your life. Step one is to start talking again. Say nice things, be affectionate and laugh together. Step two is to work on how you feel about yourself. Finally, ask him how he feels and use this to connect because I suspect he wants to change as much as you do.