‘The pandemic left me with social anxiety’
Katie Roberton, 49, lives in London with her son Arthur, 10. Wrapping myself in my duvet, I curled up in bed. It was March 2020 and I’d never felt so ill. I had a fever, no energy, and just sitting up in bed was a chore. And as I turned on the TV and watched the news about a killer virus spreading across the globe, I felt afraid.
BREATHING DIFFICULTIES
As a single parent, and with each impossible breath catching in my chest, I was terrified I’d leave Arthur without a mum.
I called an ambulance and, although testing wasn’t yet available, they suspected COVID-19. Following government advice, we self-isolated, but it left me feeling cut-off from society. It took around three months before I started feeling better, but even then I still suffered from shortness of breath. The news was saturated with stories of people dying, and, mentally, I felt like I was taking a hammering.
Just two years earlier I’d been through a divorce. I’d hoped that 2020 would be the year I could get back out there, maybe even meet someone new, but lockdown put a stop to any social plans.
I felt safer and more in control by staying at home, so I concentrated on my business, creating ceramics. I usually did admin from an office, but my kiln was in my back garden, so it was easy for me to work from home.
Between work and homeschooling, life was busy, and I started to get used to my own company. I texted friends and stayed in touch online, but as restrictions began to ease, I found myself retreating from plans. I’d had my vaccinations, but was still anxious about catching COVID-19 again. Now, I realise I’ve lost so much of my confidence and I struggle with social interactions. I worry about COVID-19, I feel awkward around people and often struggle to find things to say.
NEW FOCUS
It was easy not to go out when there were laws in place, but now my anxieties stop me. I don’t often meet with friends – my priorities are my son and my business, so I focus on them.
Reintegrating into society is going to take time.
✣ Katie creates personalised handmade ceramics with a twist. Visit outlandishcreations.com or follow Instagram @outlandish_creations
‘I GOT USED TO MY OWN COMPANY’