‘Holly will be with me every step of the way’
Sheila Mitchell, 66, lives in Richmond, North Yorkshire, with her husband Robert, 67.
The sun was shining as I sat on the South Bank in London with my daughter Holly, then 31. It was May 2018, and Holly and her older sister had brought me to London as a birthday treat. As we chatted, Holly blurted out an unexpected sentence. ‘Mum, I’ve been having really dark thoughts,’ she said. ‘What do you mean?’ I replied. Holly wouldn’t say any more, but of course it worried me later as I travelled home to North Yorkshire and she went back to Nottingham, where she lived with her partner.
TOUGH GOING
Eventually we learnt through her partner that Holly was struggling with mental health issues. Soon she was prescribed antidepressants and started to self-medicate with alcohol, to my concern. From the outside Holly had a full, happy life. She loved swimming and running and was part of a triathlon club. She worked as a lawyer and had a wide circle of friends who loved her dearly; we all did. Holly’s mental health continued to suffer, and by autumn she was so unwell she was unable to work. After several trips to A&E during crisis moments, one of the doctors suggested she call Samaritans. After that, she would call them often. During another crisis point, she moved back in with me and my husband. It was tough as she was constantly up and down, still drinking heavily to numb everything.
During a good period in January 2021, she suggested I start running with her, so I began the Couch to 5K and we ran together. ‘You must keep running when I’m no longer around,’ she said one day. I turned to her in disbelief. ‘No, come on, Holly,’ I replied. ‘You don’t mean it.’ When Holly tragically passed away in November 2021 aged just 34 due to alcohol, I was distraught. Running became my lifeline and a connection to her. I’m running my first marathon as a 66-year-old grandmother this April to raise money for Samaritans. Nothing can bring Holly back, but the money I raise will help provide the person answering the call when someone is in a dark place, like Holly was. As I run the marathon, I’ll take comfort knowing that Holly will be with me every step of the way. ✣ Donate at 2024tcslondonmarathon. enthuse.com/pf/sheila-mitchell-9d8c4