Lifestyle: How to be a confident driver

However experienced you are, it’s common to lose your driving confidence sometimes. Maria McCarthy helps you overcome your fears

Once you’ve torn up your L-plates, it’s assumed that, from that moment on, you’ll be equipped to drive anywhere at any time. But that isn’t always the case.

‘Driving confidence can wax and wane throughout our lives,’ says Joanne Mallon, author of How to Overcome Fear of Driving. ‘Driving anxiety is far more widespread than is generally realised, as people are often embarrassed to admit to it. It’s particularly common among motorists who’ve experienced an accident, have had a break from driving or have recently undergone a major life change.

‘A car accident led to me avoiding driving for seven years, but now I can and do drive for pleasure. There are lots of ways to get your driving mojo back, ranging from driving tips and refresher lessons to breathing exercises or hypnotherapy.’

New routes

Many women handle their regular commute, the school run and local trips without any problem at all. But the prospect of driving to a wedding or conference miles away is far more daunting.

‘It’s easy to get stuck into a driving “comfort zone”, especially if you get into the habit of letting your partner take care of longer journeys,’ says Rebecca Ashton, a qualified driving instructor and Head of Driver Behaviour at road-safety charity IAM RoadSmart. ‘But if you don’t practise, you’ll lose confidence, so aim to get into the habit of sharing the driving – swap over regularly at the motorway services. And if you’re driving alone, planning your route in advance, together with regular rest stops, will help. A satnav can also come in useful to get you to your destination without getting lost, and if you do happen to take a wrong turn, it will redirect you.’

The M word

Statistically, motorways are our safest roads. But you need to be able to handle joining from a slip road, travelling at high speeds and coming off.

‘As you’re going up the slip road, it’s important to watch the traffic and plan where you’re going to fit in,’ says Rebecca. ‘Put your indicator on early, as it helps to attract attention. If you find motorways scary, refresher training with an experienced instructor can really help. Then make your first solo journeys at a quiet time, such as Sunday morning, to help build your confidence.’

Road rage

‘Having other drivers cut you up or beep the horn can be very unsettling,’ admits Joanne. ‘Some people are quite triggerhappy with their horn, and there’s no need to take it personally. But it’s also worth treating these incidents as a learning experience. Were you too slow or hesitant, and is

there a way you can do it better next time?’

Driving in the dark

Being dazzled by the headlights of oncoming cars is one of the trickiest aspects of driving in the dark.

‘Don’t look at the headlights,’ advises Rebecca. ‘If you do get dazzled, keep your attention on the left-hand kerb, and if it’s really challenging, pull over to give your eyes a chance to recover. Make sure your windscreen is clean inside and out so you have the best visibility possible.’

Troublesome tailgaters

There are few things more annoying than having a car tailgating close behind you, so make sure you’re in the appropriate lane for the speed you’re travelling at, and don’t stay in the outside lane just because you’re driving at the speed limit.

‘Don’t let anyone push you into driving faster than you feel it’s safe to go,’ urges Rebecca. ‘Remember – you are the one in charge of your car, not them. My approach is to pull in and let the tailgater pass – or even to go all the way around a roundabout and let them overtake me.’

Passenger problems

Maybe you’re fine when you’re driving alone, but it’s quite a different matter when there’s a critical partner or friend in the passenger seat.

‘Critical people often feel they’re being helpful, says Joanne. ‘Explain that you find negative comments stressful and that they can make matters worse. Music can discourage conversation and distract you from your companion’s attitude. If the problem is ongoing, just refuse to drive with them.’

staying calm

If you feel seriously unsettled by an incident or driving conditions, then pull over until you feel calmer. For everyday driving, there are steps you can

take to stay relaxed, such as playing soothing or happy music, breathing deeply and using affirmations such as ‘driving is safe’ and ‘my driving is fine’.

There are also hypnotherapy tapes you can buy to help you overcome driving fears, which you can listen to at home.