In future, ask ahead

My husband asked me to make dinner for some new work colleagues. I put in a lot of effort. When I brought the food to the table, one of the guests said: ‘I can’t eat that. I’m vegetarian and have other dietary needs.’ She then produced food she’d brought with her and asked me to warm it up. I was furious and my husband said that I sulked all evening. She said she hadn’t told me in advance because she didn’t want me to go to any trouble.

Shelley, Ipswich If you don’t mind my asking, how did sulking help? I understand you were put out but her behaviour wasn’t directed at you or your food. It sounds like she made a misguided decision but her intentions were honourable as she knew you’d have made her something special and she didn’t want to trouble you.

There’s nothing you can do now but, in future, you can ask any new guest if they have any dietary issues and then choose if you cook for them or ask them to bring their own food.

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161 Marsh Wall, London E14 9AP Visit Keren’s site at experiencematters.org.uk.