‘It’s natural – nothing to be ashamed of’
Kate Beavis, 49, runs marketing consultancy The Indie Practice and lives in Cranfield with her husband Adam, 48, and their two children, aged 13 and 11. I’m currently in the midst of the menopause, and my oestrogen levels are so low, I’m often exhausted. While I’m managing my symptoms, perimenopause began in 2014, at 42, which I discovered after a visit to my health practitioner, who specialises in women’s health.
‘I’m constantly on edge. I want to kill someone!’ I told her. Once calm and relaxed, I now lost my temper frequently, telling off my children, then six and four, over the smallest things. ‘Where’s my wife gone?’ asked my husband, Adam, then 41. I had no idea what was going on, so how could I expect him to?
When I heard the word ‘perimenopause’, I didn’t know what it was and listened in horror as the health practitioner told me my body had begun the transition to menopause. ‘But I thought it happened later,’ I said, confused. I’d always considered myself well informed, but only now was I learning it could last for 10 years.
Tests showed my progesterone levels were on the decline, explaining the bouts of rage. A coil helped, but while the anger subsided, migraines started, which my GP told me was down to my changing hormones. By now, I had terrible anxiety and acne, and my moods were volatile. I stopped drinking alcohol, and this gave me a clearer head.
By August 2020, with night
‘I wish I’d known more at the time’
sweats and hot flushes too, now, I called my health practitioner in tears. ‘I haven’t slept for weeks,’ I said. ‘It’s time for hormone replacement therapy,’ (HRT) she replied.
I started using HRT gel, and while my sleep improved, my skin was worse, so in December, I decided to come off it. But by August 2021, I struggled with severe fatigue, despite sleeping up to 10 hours a night. Unable to function, I knew I needed medication again.
It was a lifesaver, and my energy returned, although side effects included weight gain. I focused on exercise, walking and doing yoga, and recently hired a personal trainer, but while I’m now feeling mentally better, I wish I’d known more at the time.
Now, I’m constantly researching and share my findings with Adam. He’s learning too, and now a lot of my past moods make more sense. As women, we must remember it’s natural and nothing to be ashamed of, and we shouldn’t be afraid to ask questions. The stigma around menopause is changing, but it’s not just women who need educating – men need to know too!