He thinks I’ll cheat on him
Q
I was very fortunate to meet a man I fell head over heels in love with after a difficult marriage. He feels the same about me but he’s becoming possessive. He says he’s frightened I might cheat on him – his last wife did – or leave him. This behaviour will drive a wedge between us, though, if I don’t have any space. Name and address withheld
A
Most relationships start with an amazing and exciting chemistry: it’s a well-documented first stage of love. It then slowly moves into a comfortable attraction (the second stage), and then a deep emotional attachment (stage three). If it didn’t move from wild passion to something else, we would be burnt out and nothing would get done! It sounds like your relationship has moved to a more mature phase, which is generally more comfortable, but not in this case. I think you would benefit from some couples counselling, where this can be discussed, and he can express his concerns and understand where you are in your relationship.
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