How can I help my daughter?

Q My daughter is engaged to a man we thought was lovely. Then she told me that in a row he’d grabbed hold of her and was quite rough. When I questioned her, she said that she deserved it because she’d been really unpleasant. How do I get her to see that she can’t be with him and to get out before it’s too late? Name and address withheld A No one ever deserves it. Your daughter really needs to understand this. Physically abusing someone is absolutely unacceptable. It’s important she and her fiancé do something about it. I agree it doesn’t bode well unless he gets help with his anger.

I would encourage relationship counselling so they can talk it through and arrange to get help if she really wants to proceed with her plans. Relate is a good place to start. Visit relate.org.uk/ about-us/contact-us. It’s hard when you’re in love with someone to accept a relationship isn’t right.

If her fiancé does get help, it may all be fine. If you fear she is in any danger, remove her from the situation immediately.

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