‘BODY NEUTRALITY IS LIKE A WHITE FLAG IN MY WAR-ZONE-LIKE MIND’

Becky, 24, from Fleet, Hampshire, felt that she had been chasing body positivity for a long time – with limited results

‘I first heard about body neutrality via Megan Jayne Crabbe’s Instagram page. As someone who had been chasing body positivity for as long as I could remember, it felt refreshing to hear that I didn’t have to feel a certain way. Embracing the neutrality movement could give me more space to accept the ups and downs of a fluctuating body image – and give myself a break. It’s massively changed the way I view my body. I used to think my looks defined me. In some ways, aspiring to body positivity made me feel more aware of my body.

In shifting my focus elsewhere, I’ve become much less selfconscious, but I’ve also started appreciating the things I do that make me who I am, rather than focusing on the way that I look. It’s like a white flag in the war zone of thoughts in my head; not having to hate or love my body, I can simply accept it.

I’ve had issues with body image my whole life, and as much as I try to let go of my diet-culture obsessed days, those thoughts are still trying to cling on. I can’t just put an end to them. Body neutrality allows me to be more honest with myself. Self-love doesn’t have to be so high on my agenda, and I can get on with living my life.’

Megan Jayne Crabbe (@bodyposipanda) is an activist and author of Body Positive Power. ‘For me, being body-positive is about having a strong-as-fuck belief in yourself, but that’s a very difficult thing,’ she tells WH at an event run by the Anti-diet Riot Club. ‘You can’t just magically start thinking, “Hey, nobody else’s opinion matters!” You can’t expect people to go from years of criticising their bodies to suddenly thinking they’re flawless.’

For 20-something model Rebecca Pearson, years of anxiety over fitting into the narrow template of what a model ‘should’ look like chipped away at her self-confidence. ‘I’ve always felt uncomfortable – like I was slightly too big and my ideal body was an elusive two weeks away, if I could just stop eating pudding and hit the gym harder,’ she explains. ‘Other models always seemed to be lighter than me and more toned. I’d dread big castings and how my body would be perceived. I’d assume I’d be too big for the clothes or that I’d disappoint the client, even though this rarely happened.’ But coming across the term ‘body neutrality’ on Twitter prompted a shift in her mindset. ‘To me, body neutrality gave me permission to move away from painfully striving towards an unattainable aesthetic ideal, without the pressure. I couldn’t simply leap from worrying that my body looked disgusting and that I was failing in some way to loving every inch of myself. Body neutrality felt like a healthy middle ground. It was saying, “This is fine: I’m lucky to have an overall healthy body, and I’m going to calm down a bit about it all.”’

BOD GOALS

This middle ground seems to be a useful sweet spot; a reminder that body image is a work in progress. ‘Being neither completely loving nor completely hateful towards your body can be an important step towards breaking the black/white, good/bad polarised thinking that often accompanies body issues,’ explains Stella Stathi, a psychologist who specialises in body image. ‘It can give you something to aim for that doesn’t feel too overwhelming or impossible, but is still an important step forward.’

For Rebecca, embracing a neutral stance was not only more achievable, it has set her on a path towards a more body-positive place. ‘First, I stopped waking up at 5am to go to classes filled with women thinner than me. Then I ditched the samey salads and started cooking according to Ayurvedic principles, which nourished my body and made me feel good. I started doing barre and yoga, which I genuinely love, and I began to appreciate my body for what it could do, rather than what it looked like.’

In this way, exercise can help even those with the most negative body image to reach a more neutral place. Hannah Lewin, a PT from London, exclusively trains women and she uses the principles of body neutrality to help her clients to reach their goals. ‘Body neutrality can be a useful way of helping someone to concentrate on improving their strength and fitness without focusing too much on aesthetics,’ she explains. ‘Setting goals like improving your 10k run time or lifting heavier can make you realise just how capable your body really is – and acceptance will feel easier.’ Think back to the last time you smashed a PB in the gym or on the track and it starts to make sense. Those legs you can’t stand to look at in the mirror don’t seem all that bad when you realise they can carry you 5k in under 25 minutes.

WHOLE-ISTIC APPROACH

Adopting a neutral stance could also be a healthier approach in itself. Try to feel positive about anything all the time – be it your body, your job or your relationship – and you’re probably setting yourself up to

fail. Neutrality gives you a free pass; some leeway for those days when you just want to crawl back under the duvet and start again tomorrow. It’s for this reason that some argue it’s even more inclusive than its predecessor. ‘Disabled people – especially those of us who are of colour – are often still left out of these types of conversations,’ says Keah Brown, an activist who writes about her disability. ‘Neutrality provides people with the space to work through their complicated issues with their bodies.’

‘In reality, most women will feel positive about some aspects of their body and neutral or accepting of others,’ adds Dr Bamford. ‘A bit of both is probably the healthiest body image to have.’ A movement for those who love their legs but hate their stomach; think their bum is okay but can’t stand their cellulite – and if we’re being completely honest, isn’t that most of us? ‘For me, the biggest change has been that I now see my body as a whole, rather than a collection of not-quite-right parts,’ adds Rebecca. ‘And it’s already having a huge impact. My agency has told me that I hold myself differently these days, with more confidence, and that it translates into more bookings. It’s not that I suddenly have the body of a VS model – because I definitely don’t – but I don’t let the dread hold me back like I used to.’

Among its advocates, the overwhelming feeling that comes from embracing a bodyneutral stance can be captured in a word: freedom. Freedom from thinking about your body; freedom from the emotional energy of striving to love every bit of it. ‘When you pay less attention to your appearance and give less weight to those negative thoughts, it frees you up to focus on other aspects of your life,’ explains Dr Bamford. ‘That could be your family, your friends or your work achievements, but also getting back to your personality traits – the things that make you you.’ As Rebecca puts it: ‘It almost feels rebellious in modern society to just be; quietly feeling that my body is the consequence of the life I choose to lead.

And I’m actually pretty cool with it.’ May we suggest sliding into neutral?

BODY NEUTRALITY SEEMS TO BE A USEFUL SWEET SPOT FOR WOMEN