Words of the week

CURRENTLY in the cones hotline phase of their demise. – Louise Haigh, the Shadow Transport Secretary and Sheffield Heeley MP, on the Government’s current status.

I WAS told that at the reshuffle meeting in Downing Street “Muslimness” was raised as an “issue”. – MP Nusrat Ghani who alleges that she lost her job as a transport minister in 2020 due to her faith.

HE’S not robbed a bank. – Tory MP Andrew Rosindell defends Boris Johnson over the Partygate scandal.

SCHOOLBOY errors were made – for example allowing over 1,000 companies to receive bounceback loans that were not even trading when Covid struck. – Lord Agnew moments before resigning as a Minister at the House of Lords despatch box.

LYING in public life is not a sensible thing to do because it gets found out. – Commons Leader

Jacob Rees-Mogg during a defence of

Boris Johnson.

ON the back of fag packs, beer mats and order checks. – Chef Jamie Oliver on how he wrote his first cookery book.

IT shouldn’t be that big an issue in this day and age. – Leeds United’s Patrick Bamford on the reluctance of gay footballers to reveal their sexuality due to homophobia.

IF I don’t get injured when I’m filming I’m not doing it properly. – James Bond actor Daniel Craig, after spending an entire interview bleeding from his forehead following a mishap while setting up lighting equipment.

WE should say “Goodbye, Mr Chips, Hello, James Dyson” and make sure that our curriculum better prepares pupils for the world of work. – Robert Halfon MP, chair of Parliament’s Education Committee.

THERE really isn’t a big enough Scout badge for that. – The Duchess of Cambridge praises 13-year-old Leo

Street, who raised more than £8,000 for mentalhealth text service Shout by sleeping outside in a hammock for a year.

THE answer is... after an awfully extensive measuring, only a quarter of an inch. Extraordinary. – Sir David Attenborough, 95, has revisited a desert bush he was photographed with 40 years ago, only to find it has barely grown.