The River Cottage Meat Book.

I DON’T HAVE TO SPEND AGES COMING UP WITH A BRILLIANT GIFT FOR MY PARTNER At least I know I can buy my dad socks. Not only does a present for your partner cost, on average, an eye-watering £150, but men are also notoriously tricky to buy for. I once had a pair of Nike Air Max trainers embossed with an ex-boyfriend’s initials (making them non-refundable), only to discover I’d chosen the exact colour palette of his rival football team. Times worn: zero. This year, instead of frantically Googling gift ideas, I can focus on the important stuff, such as perfecting my Christmas negroni. (Delicious, by the way.) …OR FAKE ENTHUSIASM AT THEIR ‘PERFECT’ PRESENT FOR ME Several Christmases ago, a boyfriend presented me with – I was a vegetarian at the time. Last year, my friend’s husband bought her a dehumidifier for their spare room ( just try unwrapping that with a grin). So I count myself lucky that I’ve escaped the whole charade, and take all those #bestboyfriendever Instagram posts with a pinch of salt – almost anything looks amazing with a filter, after all. I CAN CONTINUE THE FAMILY LIMONCELLO CHALLENGE WITHOUT JUDGMENT Is there anything worse than explaining your family’s weird rituals to an outsider who doesn’t quite get it? Being single means not having to justify why your Great Aunt Glenda is on her third shot of limoncello at 11am, or why your mum insists on using a Subbuteo football figure in her nativity scene. Equally, there’s nothing worse than being in the awkward company of someone else’s family and their ferociously complicated annual ping-pong tournament (who knew there were so many rules?). NO ONE EXPECTS ME TO HOST Who’s stressing over cooking turkey for 12? Not me! Instead of faffing over Jamie Oliver’s pan-fried sprouts, I get to lie on the sofa in a sea of Ferrero Rocher and Quality Street wrappers, breezing in just minutes before dinner is served. Amazing.

One year a boyfriend gave me I was vegetarian

IT’S A TIME TO DO WHATEVER I WANT Over Christmas, my schedule is my own and nobody else’s. I’ll do what I like – I don’t have to consider a partner’s feelings or worry about whether I’m being selfish. Listen to Mariah Carey’s entire album in bed before getting up. Run that 3pm bath. Snack on Jacob’s crackers and mulled wine until dinner if