‘Should we take a trip together?’

Q I’m really fed up with my friend. She has a supportive family but she moans all the time about her health issues and the fact that she isn’t very mobile any more. We live in the same apartment block and now she wants us to go on a coach holiday together. This would mean sharing a room and I don’t want to do that. How can I tell her without falling out with her? Audrey, Barnsley

Rosie says I think we all deal with health problems in different ways, Audrey. Some people just ‘get on with it’ others like to talk a lot about their problems. I meet lots of people who have many health problems who try their hardest to enjoy life to the best of their ability.

The holiday issue is a tricky one but my advice is to make your feelings clear now before your friend starts to make plans. Holidays should be a time for relaxation and, from what you say, you wouldn’t have a very relaxing time with this particular friend!

Sharing a room with a friend is a big step too. We all need our own space. At least if you have your own room, you can ‘escape’ there for an hour or so, or choose to have an early night! I suggest – if you want to go away with your friend that you look at some of the popular holiday centres which offer plenty of activities which you could do separately, as well as together and often meals and evening entertainment are included.

Most importantly, there are sure to be other people around for a chat and you might be able to learn some new skills or enjoy a relaxing swim. If you really don’t want to go away with your friend, I’m afraid you need to be honest and to say so. It may cause some friction at the time but it’s better to be honest than to have a stressful holiday! If you do decide to go away, make sure you book a room just for yourself!

Happy holidays, Audrey!