Give yourself gift of traveling alone
On traveling alone:
In a move that was completely out of character for me, I took a trip to Europe alone in spite of my incredibly overprotective family’s attempts to dissuade and interfere.
It is not hyperbole to say that the trip changed my life. While it was daunting, it forced me to realize that I could rely on myself, and that scary doesn’t always mean bad. I spent a week with a rental car and a GPS, and I came home with a new lease on life.
Don’t ask permission. Don’t phrase it in such a way that leaves worried family members room to believe their guilt will change your mind. Make a positive, straightforward, confident statement about your plans. Then, release your mind and heart.
The most beautiful thing about traveling alone is that you are beholden to no one else. You eat when you want. Sleep when you want. If you come to a place that touches you, you can sit there as long as you like without being prodded to move on by the waning interest of a companion.
Allow yourself this gift, and feel no guilt about accepting it. Two trips later, my family tends toward awe when I talk about the things I saw and did all by myself. It created in them a new kind of respect, but more than that, it created in me a new kind of self-respect. — Not All Those Who Wander Are Lost
On being left out:
I didn’t fit in growing up. I tried being overly nice, I tried honesty, I tried petty/vindictive. With the latter, I caused the few people who did like me to keep their distance.
As I grew up, I learned to see what I was doing that contributed to my being left out, and what was out of my control. After this, not only was I less bothered by it when it occurred, it simply happened less — in part because I liked myself and could laugh at myself more. Amazing how people instinctively like people comfortable in their own skin and able to let things go.
And it’s an upward spiral; The more people see it, the more people respond, the less I experience the negative effect of others.
— R.
On the proper level of butting in on wedding plans:
I am typing this as I should be getting ready for my bridal shower in a few hours. I am getting married in six weeks. I am dreading my bridal shower. I am dreading my wedding. I dread anyone asking about my wedding. I dread seeing my future mother-in-law. I have stopped answering my phone because
I’m sick of being told what I should be doing for my wedding.
I love my fiance more than anything and can’t wait to marry him. That’s all I want. Why can’t people just be happy with that? I feel like I have no control over any of it. Everyone has their opinions on what THEY want, but no one seems to care that we just wanted to elope rather than have a big party.
I wish people would just butt out and let us plan our day ourselves. They don’t realize how stressful they make what should be one of the happiest times of our lives. If you want a wedding a certain way, have your own party or vow renewal or something, but please just let us be!
— Stressed Out Bride-to-be