Email identity experiment

Man swaps names with female co-worker and gets lesson in sexism

Martin Schneider and Nicole Pieri used to work together at a resume editing service, where they shared an inbox. One day, Schneider got a rude awakening about what it’s like to be a woman in the workplace.

He took to Twitter to describe the incident in a series of tweets:

“So one day I’m emailing a client backand-forth about his resume and he is just being IMPOSSIBLE. Rude, dismissive, ignoring my questions. Telling me his methods were the industry standards (they weren’t) and I couldn’t understand the terms he used (I could) ... Anyway I was getting sick of his ... when I noticed something. Thanks to our shared inbox, I’d been signing all communications as ‘Nicole.’ ”

Here’s what happened when Schneider corrected the case of mistaken identity:

“I said, ‘Hey this is Martin, I’m taking over this project for Nicole.’ IMMEDIATE IMPROVEMENT. Positive reception, thanking me for suggestions, responds promptly, saying ‘great questions!’ Became a model client. Note: My technique and advice never changed. The only difference was that I had a man’s name now.”

In the spirit of scientific inquiry, Schneider and Pieri conducted an experiment: They switched names for two weeks. The result? Schneider summed up his experience succinctly: “Folks. It ... sucked.” He included a more colorful word, however.

He went on: “I was in hell. Everything I asked or suggested was questioned. Clients I could do in my sleep were condescending. One asked if I was single.”

Pieri, on the other hand, had the most productive week of her career. Then Schneider said perhaps the most insightful thing of all: I wasn’t any better at the job than she was, I just had this invisible advantage.

He’s right. Scientists call this invisible advantage implicit bias.

Professionally, this is how it plays out: Men are more likely to get hired, more likely to get promoted, more likely to get paid more and far more likely to reach the levels of upper management. This isn’t because men are better or smarter. It’s because of implicit bias.

In Pieri’s smart blog, “Working While Female,” she describes making Schneider aware of his own implicit bias:

“I lit into Marty, telling him he had a bad habit of talking over me and ignoring me. To his credit, and probably the rea- son that we are still friends, he listened. He took it to heart. He started using his voice to bring attention to me in meetings. I’ve seen him do the same for other women in mixed settings since. I’m grateful for that.”

The thing about all -isms — racism, sexism, classism — is that most of the time, incidents of them are not obvious. They’re cumulative. Yes, of course there are exceptions to this: in-your-face sexual harassment and racial discrimination.

But most of the time it’s subtle. It’s the micro-decisions we make, the way we include or exclude certain people or perspectives, how we treat those around us without realizing we’re doing anything wrong.

Ready to do something? Here are a few practical ways to take action:

Understand that this is reality: It is not unique to one company. It is the water we’re swimming in. Things are harder for women in professional settings because of implicit bias.

Become ruthlessly self-aware: Do you challenge, question or diminish female colleagues, managers or staff? Do you make a conscious and sustained effort to hire, promote and get women into upper management in your organization? Question yourself. Question others. And note, it’s not just men who practice sexism. Women do it, too — again, primarily subconsciously.

Make yourself an ally, especially if you’re a man: If a woman is interrupted, point it out and make space for her to make her point. Stand with her if it seems as though someone’s trying to steal her idea. If someone wants to leave her out because she’s on maternity leave, don’t let them. You don’t have to be rude about it, but be firm.

Be an ally.