Albuquerque Journal

THE LIGHTER SIDE

- Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood and entertains groups and organizati­ons around the country. Email him at Argus@ArgusHamil­ton.com.

God bless America, and how’s everybody?

USA Today reports that millions and millions of Americans stood outside together on Monday and viewed the eclipse of the sun. It was a rare moment of national unity. President Trump walked outside during the eclipse and saw his shadow, and traditiona­lly that means six more weeks of comedy.

Fox News dispatched reporters to cities from Portland, Ore., to Charleston, S.C., Monday to cover the millions of people witnessing the phenomenon they would see only once in their entire lifetimes. The Great American Eclipse finally arrived. It’s called China.

North Korea returned to threatenin­g the U.S. with nuclear war on Monday during a U.S.-South Korean military exercise. They don’t scare us. In case of nuclear war, scientists say the only thing that will survive are the cockroache­s, which means the U.S. will still have a functionin­g government.

President Trump gave a speech Monday vowing that the U.S. will win the war in Afghanista­n. For centuries, it’s famous as the graveyard of empires. Those who don’t study history are doomed to repeat it, while those who study history are doomed to stand by helplessly while everyone else repeats it.

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ARGUS HAMILTON

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