THE LIGHTER SIDE
God bless America, and how’s everybody?
Oil and Gas Journal reports that President Trump is considering a gasoline tax of 25 cents a gallon for an infrastructure bill. Leave us alone. With gasoline prices already over $4 a gallon in Los Angeles, it’s cheaper to buy cocaine and run everywhere instead.
The National Football League is reportedly planning to train more women to be NFL referees on the playing field after the success of Sarah Thomas. They would be naturals as NFL refs. In my own experience, if there’s one thing women are really good at, it’s pointing out mistakes made by men.
President Trump vowed to raise tariffs against China to help protect U.S. business technology’s innovative ideas from being stolen or copied. It’s America’s thinkers who move our country into the future. I made my first fortune in Hollywood with a highly innovative idea: renting wedding rings.
President Trump was loudly cheered at a Minnesota rally when he brought up the Space Force he’s created. It sounded like they’ll buy all the cereal it takes just to get their hands on the free action figures. Joe Biden once proposed a Water Force, but it turns out we already have a Navy. Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood and entertains groups and organizations around the country. E-mail him at Argus@ArgusHamilton.com.