THE LIGHTER SIDE

God bless America, and how’s everybody?

Democratic U.S. Rep. Adam Schiff of California vowed to investigate Trump on every front. He said that as long as Trump is president, the nation’s atmosphere will be poisonous. A thousand years from now, historians will think Britain won the Revolutionary War and imposed our form of government on us out of spite.

Hollywood celebrities including Oprah and Jane Fonda failed to get the Democrat elected governor of Georgia. Star power didn’t work in the South. When Taylor Swift endorsed the Democratic Senate candidate in Tennessee, they should have known that things never end well with her and men.

Nevada voters made news when they elected the late Moonlight Bunny Ranch pimp Dennis Hof to the state Legislature. The cable news anchors had to explain with a straight face that voters who are alive elected a candidate who is dead. In Chicago, they do it the other way around.

Kensington Palace refused to say whether Meghan Markle voted in the U.S. midterm elections. Why should she vote? The whole idea of being a royal is for you to get away from this whole democracy thing and inspire the English-speaking peoples by your example to do lots of Christmas shopping this year.