THE LIGHTER SIDE

God bless America, and how’s everybody?

■Newsweek reported that the chaos in Washington last week caused widespread fears that 2021 was going to be worse than 2020 after the New Year got off to a morbid start. First to die was actress Tanya Roberts, then Tommy Lasorda, then Freedom of Speech. It always goes in threes.

■ The FBI began rounding up leaders of the U.S. Capitol riots using facial recognition from the selfies they posted on social media from inside the Capitol. What’s the same stupid thing you can say during sex that you can also say during an insurrection? Wait, let’s film ourselves doing this.

■ New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo expressed determination Wednesday to open the closed theaters in New York, saying he wants actors, dancers, singers and comics back to work. Every morning I wake up with the same thought. I need to get out of bed, or I’ll be late for the couch.