THE LIGHTER SIDE

God bless America, and how’s everybody?

■ The Jacksonville Jaguars landed the great college head coach Urban Meyer this week. Urban is the rare coach who’s certain to remain with one team for a long time. The world’s top scientists reckon that by 2025, you will never be more than eight feet away from a former New York Jets coach.

■ The Census Bureau reports millennials have surpassed baby boomers as the country’s largest generation. I’ve been a typical baby boomer all my life. Which means that today, my ability to remember song lyrics from the 1960s far exceeds my ability to remember why I came into the kitchen.

■ The White House ordered 7,000 National Guard troops to stay in Washington, D.C., to maintain civil calm. While they’re in the nation’s capital, the Guard has taken off their desert camouflage uniforms. In order to blend into the background, they’re dressed as lobbyists and hookers.