Love is scraping the windshield

After Jerry, my future husband, took me on a date to a Catholic wedding that consisted of dinner, dancing and an open bar, I was flabbergasted. You have to realize that as a Protestant, I was accustomed to a basic ceremony, followed by cake and coffee in the church gymnasium and candy coated almonds if you were lucky. Catholics were much more serious about their nuptials and planned their weddings accordingly. On July 31, 1971, we had a ceremony where we wrote our own vows followed by dinner, dancing and an open bar at a wonderful restaurant.

Then came the honeymoon or lack there-of. Because Jerry had to return to Cambridge, Massachusetts, almost immediately where he was a grad student, we planned to drive there from Oak Park, Illinois, in a Volkswagen Beetle (it gets better) towing a 6-foot trailer. So Jerry booked a room after our wedding at a local hotel for one night in lieu of a honeymoon that would occur sometime in the future.

Driving to Cambridge in our “Bug” pulling a 6-foot trailer was a little like the story “The Little Engine That Could.” Arriving at our “new” apartment located across from the Harvard Observatory was truly like coming home complete with a note on the refrigerator from our friends, Sharon and Pete, congratulating us along with a bottle of Asti Spumanti ice cold in the fridge.

We relocated to Albuquerque in 1976. Even after having three children, Jerry and I always seemed to find a way to connect even if it was a “date” at the local bookstore or when we retired, eating at Costco’s food court before shopping. We have always written some kind of goals or objectives for our lives not just as couples, but personal goals and during the last decades have included even more categories — such as spiritual, family, personal goals, couples’ goals, interior and exterior of our house, financial, etc. At times we have done great in some categories, but have frankly sucked in others. But we keep on trying!

This July 31 will be our 50th wedding anniversary. Jerry has never been the type to send me a bouquet of balloons or a singing telegram at work; but he has scraped my windshield of ice numerous times before I had to leave for work. He has done a thousand things to show me he loves me; like fixing my necklace without my asking; rubbing my neck or back spontaneously; or taking care of me after having surgery. My spouse has always been there for me and accepted me as I am. I am truly blessed and honored to be his partner.

P.S. We eventually went on our official “honeymoon” many years later on a cruise to Alaska.