Why try writing when you are so bad at it?

My relatives and friends must often wonder why I decided on a writing career when I became an adult. Now there is a new development that might help me, which I’ll explain at the end.

When I was in class in a red brick school in Idaho, the two-story building housed first through fourth grades downstairs and fifth through eighth grades on the second story.

To graduate from the eighth grade eight miles away from high school, which was in Nampa, students had to present excellent examples of Palmer Method handwriting.

It was difficult for my fingers. I sat up late at night trying to write an acceptable, readable few paragraphs. After several weeks, the teacher gave me a pass.

I took typing in high school and again had to repeat a few lines perfectly to make the grade.

After many tries, I submitted my attempt and the teacher, who knew that I had two older sisters, accused me of having someone else type my entry.

I explained how many times I had to try to get it acceptable.

In recent months, there are reports that the Trump Justice

Department secretly obtained Washington Post journalists’ phone records and tried to obtain their email records over reporting they did in the early months of the Trump administration on Russia’s role in the 2016 election, according to government letters and officials.

The letters listed work, home or cell phone numbers covering that three-and-a-half month period.

News organizations and First Amendment advocates have long decried the government practice of seizing journalists’ records in an effort to identify the sources of leaks, saying it unjustly chills critical news gathering.

The last such high-profile seizure of reporters’ communications records came several years ago as part of an investigation into the source of stories by a reporter who worked at BuzzFeed, Politico and the New York Times. The stories at issue there also centered around 2017 reporting on the investigation into Russian election interference.

Here’s my plan: Let the thieves copy my column and then rewrite it so I can understand it.

I’ll expect perfection, and don’t derail my chain of thought so I can make perfect sense for a change.

That way my past imperfections will disappear and never be heard from again.

I’m seven decades late on my solution, but I’m a slow thinker.