Cyberbullying harmful to child’s development
Social networking has evolved into something that to the traditionalists and baby boomers are not customary. Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, blogs, Skype and Myspace are unfamiliar territory. But for our sons, daughters and grandchildren, technology based networking and socializing are as natural as the air they breathe.
Our lack of experience and grounding of different sets of social skills, make us less of an expert in guiding our youngsters to maneuver themselves in this new social arena. The modern technological life seems over our heads unless we embrace it as the norm. We have no choice but learn and adapt. Our children need our guidance and surveillance to make meaning of their social experiences.
It is heartbreaking to hear that a teenager ends her or his life because of social issues that can be talked about. I’m referring to bullying in a new form — cyberbullying.
It used to be that bullying is considered to be a normal part of the growing process. The effects were less than detrimental. Now bullying had gone high-tech and the detrimental effects to a child’s development is much more concerning. Studies have found that cyberbullying has increased as social media use increased. Malicious rumors can spread in no time.
In a study of middle and high school students, the most common way of cyberbullying was through instant messaging. Other avenues include:
• Text messages.
• Email.
• Websites and blogs.
• Camera phones. About half of the preteens and teens surveyed reported that they receive bullying messages while at home, day or night. However only about 50% of the kids who had been cyberbullied had told their parents about their experience. Adults may not always present in the online environments. It is extremely important that parents are cognizant of the social implications and problems that may be encountered.
The US Department of Health and Human Services offers these tips:
• Keep your home computers in easily viewable places, such as a family room or kitchen.
• Talk regularly with your child about online activities that he or she is involved in.
• Encourage your child to tell you if he or she is aware of others who may be victims of cyberbullying.
• Explain that cyberbullying is harmful and unacceptable social behavior. Outline your expectations for responsible online behavior and make it clear that there will be consequences for inappropriate behavior.
• Although adults must respect the privacy of children and youth, concerns for your child’s safety may sometimes override these privacy concerns. Tell your child that you may review his or her online communications if you think there is reason for concern.
• Consider installing parental control filtering software and/or tracking programs, but don’t rely solely on these tools.
• Strongly encourage your child not to respond to the bullying.
• Do not erase the messages or pictures. Save these as evidence.
• Try to identify the individual doing the cyberbullying. Even if the cyberbully is anonymous, there can be a way of tracking them through your Internet service provider. If you suspect criminal intent (threats of violence, extortion, stalking, hate crimes, etc.), contact the police.
The state of California is one of the many states that have specific state law on bullying. You may go to the Web site for the state legislature and insert “bullying” as a search item.
Above all, teach your kids not to be bullies and help them understand the detrimental effects of bullying as innocent as they think it seems. Kids who are bullies may grow up to be bullies. Bullies in the workplace are not desirable or needed.