Author, tired and sweaty, has finally arrived
I’m writing four days removed from my first ever Bouchercon.
For those who’ve never heard of Bouchercon — which I’m guessing is most of you — it’s an annual mystery convention named after author, reviewer and editor Anthony Boucher, a man I’m guessing you’ve also probably never heard of.
Despite never having heard of the convention or nearly all the authors in attendance, I was still nervous. Terrified would be the better word. Why?
I was about to meet some of the most important people in the publishing business. Agents, editors, publishers, authors I’ve spent most of my adult life worshipping — they were all gathered around the hotel lobby bar when I finally arrived. Hundreds of them. My knees buckled. My armpits started to sweat. I felt like I was about to go down, hard.
This also might have had something to do with the fact that my son woke from a bad dream at 2 that morning. After I got him back to bed, I decided to stay up and use the extra time to get ready for the long day ahead.
Bad choice. Five hours later, I was boarding a twohour flight to North Carolina, where I would endure a layover before jetting off to Minneapolis, home of Bouchercon 2022.
Twelve hours after my son’s nightmare, I finally arrived in the Twin Cities, feeling as if I were trapped in a bad dream myself.
I was scheduled to accept an award on behalf of fellow author and dear friend James Kestrel (if you haven’t read “Five Decembers,” I highly recommend it) at the opening ceremonies that night. I’d packed a sport coat, which was wadded in the bottom of my carry-on bag. When I pulled it out, the coat looked about
like I felt, wrinkled and in need of a deep clean.
I hung the coat in the bathroom and hopped into a steaming hot shower. When I emerged, I was feeling better, and thankfully, my coat was wrinkle free. It’s hard to describe exactly how I was feeling as I set off for the evening’s festivities. Maybe it was something like Christmas Eve, a youthful anticipation of the weekend ahead. More than anything, I was excited about the chance to meet my heroes, authors whose books had shaped my work, my career, my life.
Since I spoiled the suspense earlier, you already know most of them were waiting for me when I finally arrived for the opening ceremonies.
Cue the buckling knees, the sweaty pits, the feeling that I was about to fall flat on my face. But then I heard, “Eli?” I scanned the crowd. Had someone just said my name? A lowly debut author from Arkansas who couldn’t even get a reply to an email a year ago? “Eli!”
Yes, someone was saying my name, accepting me into the crowd with open arms and kind words about my work. It made me feel like I had arrived. Like I was part of the club. I was finally a real author.
The feeling lasted over the course of the next three days, with every conversation, every panel only adding more fuel to that first night’s beautiful fire. I had dinner with my editor, publisher, publicist and agent. I went out for late-night pizza, got lost downtown, and was guided safely back home by a living literary legend. Beyond all that, I came home knowing that the old adage “Never meet your heroes” is a bunch of hogwash.
The truth is, there isn’t much celebrity involved in being an author. Beyond John Grisham and Stephen King, I’d bet most of today’s bestselling authors could walk down your local Main Street and nobody would bat an eye.
Sure, authors have fans. In certain circles, certain authors are “famous.” The same way big-time Realtors are famous at regional sales meetings.
But here’s the thing about writers: We’re introverts at heart, people with big dreams we wrestle down into words, simply doing our best to try to make sense of life’s mysteries.
It follows, then, that when we meet someone — anyone — who shares our same, strange disposition, we don’t turn up our noses. We don’t look down on them. Far from it. Instead, we smile and let them know they’re not alone. Eli Cranor is an Arkansas author whose debut novel, “Don’t Know Tough,” is available wherever books are sold. He can be reached using the“Contact”page at elicranor.com and found on Twitter @elicranor.