Becoming happy
Got enough happiness in your life nowadays? There usually are a slew of articles in the magazines this time of year about the meaning of happiness and how to achieve and maintain it. This year has been no different.
Lasting happiness, as opposed to moments of being happy, is described in various ways.
One study explains it this way: “An enduring state of mind consisting not only of feelings of joy, contentment, and other positive emotions, but also of a sense that one’s life is meaningful and valued.”
Sure sounds good to me.
But how do you and I get there and maintain that level of contentment in this tumultuous world we’ve created? Experts from universities and psychologists readily offer their educated views: Find a sense of purpose, think of the needs of others before yourself, do those things that bring joy to your life and immerse yourself in them.
Good advice. But I find the rub lies in the fact that I can have a difficult time overcoming ingrained habits and prejudices acquired over the decades. Unmet expectations also factor into my happiness. After all, it’s impossible to reconcile disappointment with being content.
Without a sense of purpose, what’s left for me? Always thinking first of myself without regard for others leaves me self-absorbed and bitter.
So what does that leave? Eating? Acquiring more material things to leave behind before too long that most others won’t even want?
My unprofessional observations gleaned from feeling the depths of unhappiness to the heights of being content led me to other suggestions for valued readers: Giving as much as I take from others, especially those closest to me, makes me happy. Having a loving wife, partner and companion makes me happy. I find great joy in interacting with our little loving companion taco terrier Benji.
Being able to share my thoughts regularly with readers across my beloved native state brings fulfillment and happiness. A beloved circle of good and enduring friends makes me happy. My natural and stepchildren offer me so much contentment. Being able to appreciate the natural beauty of this mysterious world and the nature surrounding us brings me joy.
Two years ago before the joy of neck cancer, when I could still safely swallow, I would have included food. But those days are forever gone, so I look elsewhere.
Our constant search to achieve the experience of being happy in this world has always been with us. The ancient Greek philosophers had relevant thoughts on genuine happiness centuries ago.
Generally speaking, Plato believed people could be happy if they were moral and followed four cardinal values of “temperance, fortitude, prudence, and justice.” Plato’s student, Aristotle, saw happiness as the overall goal of existence and believed people could achieve it by living virtuously while using their critical thinking and reasoning skills.
It could be possible to apply both philosophers’ views on happiness to our lives by having principles and sticking to them, living in the present, setting reasonable goals, and seeking balance within one’s spirit. I also believe working with a licensed therapist in person or online could also help a troubled person find happiness.
A steadily increasing number of Americans have turned to antidepressants to rediscover happiness over the past decade. At least one in every 10 Americans 12 years and over are reported to be taking antidepressant medication. Females are more likely take antidepressants than are males, and non-Hispanic white persons are more likely to take antidepressants than are other race and ethnic groups.
Other nations such as Iceland and the United Kingdom have usage numbers even higher than ours.
BENJI ON DUTY
Since I mentioned Benji above, I thought I’d elaborate a bit on why the fuzzy little fella brings so much daily fascination and happiness into our world. Dog owners likely will relate.
Not only does he do little antics that make us laugh, showing he has a mind and will of his own, but it’s fascinating just watching the simple things he does and trying to get inside his head.
Too often in this hectic world we take our pets for granted and don’t spend time trying to comprehend their thought processes.
For instance, the other day Benji was sitting in the fenced backyard standing guard while basking in the sun and taking in the day.
He would stare in silence at something to his right for a long moment, then slowly shift his gaze to the left. After thoroughly surveying that area, he would peer straight ahead before repeating the sequence over and over, ensuring all was well in his world and ours.
Ordinarily I wouldn’t have spent time studying his behavior, but the minutes I watched helped me understand his inherent sense of responsibility and feel even closer to the reasoning animal he is.
Now go out into the world and treat everyone you meet exactly like you want them to treat you.
Mike Masterson is a longtime Arkansas journalist, was editor of three Arkansas dailies and headed the master’s journalism program at Ohio State University. Email him at mmasterson@arkansasonline.com.