Woman wants to shed excess skin
Dear Abby:
As a child, I was sexually, physically and mentally abused. As an adult, I suffered several miscarriages and two of my children died as infants. I have two living children, ages 9 and 16. It should be no surprise that I turned to food for comfort; I ate myself to a whopping 420 pounds.
After my marriage ended in a bitter divorce, I decided it was time for a complete makeover. I have lost more than 200 pounds. Because of my weight loss, I have gained better health, more energy, a better outlook on life — and almost 36 pounds of baggy skin.
Insurance will not help with skin removal. Burn centers use skin from cadavers, so I can’t donate it to a good cause. I just need assistance in overcoming this oversized birthday suit. Can you please advise?
— Left Hanging In Colorado
Dear Left Hanging:
I addressed your question to Los Angeles plastic surgeon Joel Aronowitz, who suggests you start calling around to universities that offer plastic surgery residencies. It’s possible a resident could perform your surgery under the supervision of an experienced attending physician, and you would pay a lower rate for the procedure than you would be charged by a private physician.
He also told me that insurance should pay for the excision of skin in areas where it overlaps with other skin, because it could be medically necessary if it causes rashes or infections that are giving you problems.
Many people finance their plastic surgeries through companies that specialize in this. The doctor’s patient coordinator can direct you to one that works with the practice. However, I would advise you to wait until you have lost all of the weight you intend to before getting anything done.
About 10 years ago, I became involved with a man I later found out was married. I ended the relationship and ceased all contact with him because I didn’t want to be the cause of a broken family. Since then, I no longer think of myself as a good person, Abby. I can’t forget that I was the “other woman,” and I feel horrible about it.
I avoid the dating scene. With all the free time I have now, I realize how lonely I am. Do you have any advice?
Dear Abby:
— Miserable In Killeen, Texas
Dear Miserable:
Yes. Please stop feeling guilty and flogging yourself for what happened. In a sense, you were as much a victim of this cheater as his wife was. While I understand why you’d question your judgment or have some trust issues, by avoiding all contact with men, you have gone too far. If necessary, talk this through with a religious adviser or a licensed mental health professional.