Anybody know what counties really do?

There are 254 of them, alphabetically from Anderson to Zavala. Every Texan lives in one.

Because we’re Texas, we have more of them than any other state. Georgia, improbably, is second with 159. Delaware has only three. Alaska doesn’t have any, opting instead for 19 “organized boroughs” and one unorganized one. Louisiana also doesn’t have any, opting instead for parishes.

Our most populous one is Harris with 4.65 million people. Loving has the fewest people, 81, as of 2017.

Square-mileage-wise, Brewster is our biggest with 6,193 square miles (though it’s only the 39th largest in the U.S.) and Rockwall is our smallest with only 149.

Counties, folks. We’re talking counties, easily the least understood level of Texas government. Quick, tell me who your county commissioner is.

Texas counties have an identity problem. That’s not me saying that. That’s the Texas Association of Counties saying that. And it’s a problem that lingers — so much so that the association is taking another shot at getting attention for its entertainingly informative video, produced in 2016 and re-promoted this week in a tweet that said, “What exactly does a county do? Find out here.”

The video features characters identified as a “McLennan County girl,” a city girl from Waco who asks, “All that county stuff is in the country, right?” and a state guy who assures the city girl, “Hold on there, missy. Whether you live in the city or not, you’re just as much a part of the county as anyone else.”

An off-screen Voice of God chimes in with “That’s right. And your state, your city and your county all have important jobs to do.”

Counties, the Voice (who turns out to be a guy named Chet) intones, are “where the rubber meets the road on carrying out the state’s priorities.”

Counties, we’re told, run courts and jails; provide law enforcement; run elections; register voters; build and maintain roads; provide health care for low-income residents; collect taxes and keep track of who owns land; who’s been born and who’s dead.

And you thought all counties did was run rodeos. Oh, ye of little factual information.

On the video, City Girl, suddenly sounding like a substitute civics teacher, sums it all up: “Oh, so I get it. The county is actually the political subdivision enabled by the Texas Constitution to carry out state laws but with direct and connected relationship to the people it serves.”

Here’s some more about our least understood level of government, including a bit about some confusing things that contribute to the confusion.

The elected body in charge of counties is called the Commissioners Court. It’s not a court like you think of courts. The presiding person in this not-a-court court is