Questions to all answers
Red Sox can lead any fan to wonder
Here’s a quick update on your 2017 Red Sox:
The No. 3/former No. 1 starter has a mysterious injury in his forearm.
We believe the proper medical term is “Claybuchholzitis.”
No one knows when he’ll pitch again.
The new set-up guy has a sore shoulder.
The new backup third baseman has a left-hamstring strain.
The No. 4 starter — left forearm flexor strain — has joined the set-up guy and third baseman on the disabled list.
Oh, and the new first baseman has the flu.
April Fools? Only if you were planning on catching any duck boat parades before February.
As New England Sports Nation marks time before Tom Brady and the Patriots exterminate the universe — the Patriots may win as many games as Chris Sale this season — the Red Sox offer plenty of compelling story lines entering the 2017 campaign.
The good centers around an outfield that screams “Lynn, Rice and Dewey Redux” and the best 1-2 rotation in the American League.
The not-so-good takes everything else into account that’s not named Dustin Pedroia and Xander Bogaerts.
Of the 973 or so questions concerning this year’s version of the Red Sox, here are five to get you through the weekend:
1. When will David Price pitch again?
Answer: My money says Patriots Day . . . 2018.
2. Can the Red Sox replace the run production of David Ortiz?
Answer: No, but watching them try will be mustsee TV before Sept. 7 when the Patriots return.
3. Will Hanley Ramirez play more than 140 games?
Answer: Only on MLB The Show 2017.
4. Does Pablo Sandoval stay in the lineup, off Instagram and away from Kane’s Donuts?
Answer: Yes, no and very no.
5. How long is John Farrell’s metaphorical leash? Answer: Memorial Day. I know, this much negativity in April is unhealthy. State-run media tells us these injuries are shortterm concerns or mere roster manipulations. Price will be back before the Celtics finish their playoff push, and those gluten-free Fenway Franks are to die for.
The Red Sox did win 93 games last year, captured the AL East and made it all the way to Game 3 against the Indians in the ALDS.
The admiration and angst flowed, however, as Jon Lester and the Boston Cubs ended the greatgrandmother of all curses. Theo Epstein bronzed his official “Bill Belichick of Baseball” statue. And for the first time in 108 years, folks can say “defending world champion Cubs” when they refer to David Ross’ favorite team on “Dancing With The Stars.”
Those AL East champion hats didn’t purchase Dave Dombrowski any additional job security. Dombro — all the cool writers call him that — traded the farm and the Red Sox cap on Yoan Moncada’s Cooperstown plaque to make a title run this year.
The Red Sox’ offseason moves produced soaring expectations and a whiff of desperation. That’s always an incendiary mix.
And there’s no better way to start a baseball season than with the extremely likely appearance of Brady, Belichick, a few of their pals from Foxboro and at least five Lombardi Trophies at Fenway Park.
First pitch is 2:05 p.m. Monday. Get there early.
Bill Speros (aka Obnoxious Boston Fan) co-hosts The Obnoxious Boston show with Meredith Gorman Mondays at noon on Herald Radio. He can be reached at bsperos1@gmail.com. Follow him on Twitter @ RealOBF.