Dear Abby: Divorced bro says I can’t celebrate anniversary

Dear Abby: I was married in a double wedding with my twin brother.

Fast-forward: My husband and I will celebrate our 25th anniversary in three months. My brother and his wife divorced 10 years ago. Our three adult children want us to have a big anniversary celebration, as do my husband and I.

My brother says that since it would have been his anniversary too, I’m being selfish and insensitive to his feelings. Our mother agrees!

Both said if we have a party, they will not attend.

I think they are the ones being selfish. My husband and I have had our share of hardships, but we worked and talked through them. I feel we deserve this celebration not only for us, but also our kids and friends. Your thoughts? — Silver Anniversary

in Arizona Dear Silver: You are neither selfish nor insensitive. Celebrate your 25th anniversary (congratulations, by the way) in any fashion or at any time you and your family choose.

It is regrettable that your self-centered twin brother and overly indulgent mother adopted the attitude they have and attempted to make the occasion all about him, but the choice was theirs.

Graciously accept their refusal to attend, have the party and enjoy every minute of it.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com.