On ‘Life Support’
Madison Beer opens up about net fame, net pain on new album
Imagine being an unknown teen singer and posting a song on YouTube. The next day your favorite pop star has retweeted it and TV producers are beating down your door. For the singer/ actress Madison Beer, who became an instant internet sensation at age 13 after a little help from Justin Bieber, life was never the same after that.
“My life was literally flipped upside down,” she said in an interview this week. “I had a tweet go out and the next day “Good Morning America” was on the phone — and I was the biggest Justin Bieber fan on planet Earth, so to this day I am honoring him for doing that. If you had told the 13-year-old me, ‘You’re going to get a lot of hate,’ I would have said, ‘Who cares, I’m going to get all this attention!’ So there are times when I really feel for my younger self.”
As she learned soon enough, growing up in public has its downside. And the darker side of celebrity is one theme on “Life Support” — her new album and first fulllength, which Beer, who is now 21, supports with a House of Blues appearance on Monday. Musically, it swaps her earlier teen-pop for a moodier sound that brings Lana del Rey and Ariana Grande to mind. And the lyrics open up about a recent breakup (with entrepreneur and fellow internet figure Zack Bia) as well as her diagnosis with borderline personality disorder.
“Writing songs about my personal life was really new to me, and it was a decision I had to consciously make. Songs like (previous hits) ‘Home With You,’ ‘Hurts Like Hell’ — those kind of sassy, bad-girl anthems aren’t really who I am. As someone who’s been constantly ripped apart by the internet, it can feel intimidating to open up. And having a platform and having followers, I wanted people to know that there is a lot of stuff that happens offline that they don’t know about. That’s why I decided to be so open. Particular for girls who may have mental health issues, I wanted them not to feel so alone.”
And the internet spotlight can be especially tough when she’s been picked on for everything from her fashion-model looks to her love for the classic novel “Lolita.”
“I always say to people that I don’t think the human mind, body and soul were meant to be commented on and hated on and talked about by hundreds of millions of people. If you’re an adolescent it can be really difficult. I have terrible trust issues, and I’m constantly paranoid that people are out to get me. It’s really taxing on the soul. I’ve worked a lot, I’m in therapy twice a week, and I think I’m in a good place now, but it can still be really difficult. Of course there’s an upside — I have the most incredible fanbase, beautiful people who have really changed my life. But it’s my nature to focus on the negative. And when someone is commenting on you like that, they’re confirming that what you’re insecure about is real.”
Performing for a live audience has been far more satisfying; when we talked she was just two nights into the tour. “I wanted to approach this like I’ve never done before, so every song really brings the visuals and the lighting. The other night felt like a fever dream. I do so many quick costume changes that the show goes by so fast; I was putting on my last outfit and realizing that every second was just soaring by. Time gets crazy when you’re having that much fun.”